I've had people from time to time tell me that I look tired or stressed. Sometimes I feel fine, but the body is weary. Obviously I wear my mental condition on my sleeve. I wish that I could change that, but after 34 years of life, I'm pretty sure it's ingrained at this point. If I look tired, I probably am which is how healing looks at this point.
Some wonderful things that I've been a small part of lately are: a Women's Conference for our Church where I helped make cupcakes and cute cookies, then got to speak. That was really fun and uplifting for me. I was also called to serve in our children's group, which will also be wonderful! We've decorated for Christmas, done some shopping, and fit a doctor's visit in there too.
The latest visit was with my brachy therapy physician, Dr. L. What Dr. B2 found the week before, was not to be found at this visit. He said that all felt normal and that I was continuing to heal. I felt massive amounts of relief when he said that all was well! He then did the unthinkable and opted for a rectal exam. ::shudder:: Needless to say there were tears, and I am back to square one with the bleeding in that area. What can you do? I can only confess that I wish I had had a leather strap to bite down on, my cheek took the brunt of the pain and it's hurt for a few days now.
During these days I've also been the recipient of so many lovely cards, and donations. Thank you to the McCall family who held a drawing for my cause. They raffled off a beautiful guitar and donated the proceeds to my medical bills. Coach's cousins also sent wonderful checks our direction to aid with medical bills. It is really hard to express the gratitude in my heart for so many that have given of themselves, so that we could keep our heads above water. Thank you, truly.
Wishing you the happiest of Holidays!!! ~Kami
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