Recently my youngest has been consumed with being an older brother. He has a cousin close to his age, whose mother just had a beautiful, baby boy; and G thinks he should get one too. This has precipitated many conversations as to why that just isn't possible for me.
What has healed to a dull ache, is still just a dull ache. I would LOVE nothing more than to be able to give him that wonderful gift. I'm in such a great place these days. We have no intention of moving anytime soon, we love our home, love our neighborhood, love our church, are happy being close to family. It really would be a great time to add the final caboose to our family, and yet......
Rather than focus on what I can't do; I'm choosing to surround myself with what I can.
1. I can love my three children more, because I know they are all that I have.
2. I can love other people's children more as well, because children who were once taken for granted, now are such a gift to me.
3. I can feel blessed that I was able to have the three boys that I did, with minimal complications.
4. I can feel good knowing that the job I do as a Mother is a pretty important one, and focus on that.
Today G told me he couldn't love me anymore because I can't make him a big brother. I know this isn't true, because lets me honest...what's not to love, right? Ha ha! In time I think he'll be all right, but in the meantime I will just do a better job taking him around other people's babies and letting him soak up their joy.
Good times & Happy thoughts~Kami
2 comments:
I'm inspired by the direction you are taking this, though I know it must hurt your heart at times. Good ol' G-- someday he'll realize how lucky he was to get to be the baby of the family :-)
While our circumstances differ, I so feel you on this and understand, my dear sister-friend. All my love, prayers, and best wishes for you and yours this holiday season!
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